1) Rolly Polly!:
Its quite simple its like buttering your prawns. spread a wide amount of ketchup pick on the most innocent macaroni and then pick 'em on by youre fork and do a scrubby dubby dub! And rub him against the floor (well actually the plate) but still make him feel the pain and anguish!!!
Tear 'em part!!..from limb to limb..make sure that pasta suffers the pain and then shred it into pieces..well theres one problem you wouldn't be able to actually eat it.
3)Pointy! (only applies to elbow macaroni)
Take that macaroni and between the hole place one of the fork's pointy thingys and place it deeeper until it reaches the edge of the fork repeat the process until the macaroni is worn out and your pleasure is fulfilled!
This ones kinda fun but messy but hold on messy things are fun rite? Anyways place a handful of macaroni in the center of the palm and then gradually close it into a fist and then press harder--and harder! and harder!--until you can't find a difference between macaroni and mashed potatoes
5)Terrible Teeth! (This one is kinda good cuz it actually goes into youre mouth--that is in pieces)
Place the macaroni at the edge of you're teeth and let the mashing smashing biting licking begin but remember it should be locked in your mouth and make sure there's enough damage as possible then swallow it down in your gullet and makes sure it never comes back out of your digestive system!!
Well thats how I do it--anyways my point wait god I cant concentrate dont blame me blame the awesome music of Numb encore ok where was I oh yeah cooking raw with the Brooklyn boy. which reminds me next time raw macaroni its your turn!! So whos gonna start a riot against macaroni!?? Okay that's weird--cuz crickets cant riot or can they?? Well umm okay now were done torturing can we start discussing the awesomeness of Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches??!!